Monsters

Monsters

They hurt you

And call it love

They whisper it’s okay

It stays between us.

They touch you in places

They’re not supposed to

And tell a young child

What they need to do

A hand between your legs

And one over your mouth

Warnings foretold

If you should shout

The creek of a door

As its silently closed

Your mind screaming out

How can nobody know?

Your hands bound by stockings

Your legs kicking the air

Screaming for daddy

But he no longer lives here

To this day your heart stops

At the sound of a zipper

You learned to cry silently

Keep your voice at a whisper

You fall prey to these monsters

Becoming their victim

You search your body for signs

On how they pick them.

You try to cut it out

Try to let it go

Alone in your bedroom

You watch the blood flow.

The cuts weren’t deep enough

You somehow survived

They say that you’re lucky

To still be alive.

I can honestly say

That I wouldn’t be

If from that moment on

All eyes weren’t on me.

I was labeled suicidal depressive

From that moment on

A little girl fucked up

There was nothing wrong.

They tell you they love you

You are the chosen one

A solitary confinement

Of what love has done.

There are two traumas

That I have shared

Are they lesser infractions

Than the other two I’ve never dared

To utter a sound

Or speak of the truth

Because people like to say

“You’re not what happened to you”

So the other horrors

I’ll never impart

They are my own private hell

Buried deep in my heart.

There they’ll forever

Be my burden alone

I’ll protect those I love

From the nightmares I’ve known.

Monsters don’t hide

Under your bed

They hold you hostage forever

Inside your own head.

Emotional Baggage II

Emotional baggage

Was never meant for show and tell

Hold onto your secrets

Keep your truths to yourself

For no matter how

You try to explain the whole

There are only certain parts of you

Others really want to know.

Don’t open your suitcase

Something might fall out

They’ll perceive that one item

As if that’s all you’re about.

They’ll overlook the layers

Of all you’ve packed away

How carefully you’ve folded

What needed to remain safe.

Keep your suitcase locked

Keep it out of view

It’s already overflowing

Don’t add anything new.

Put it in your closet

Store it under your bed

All the unmentionables

You should never have said.

You must take it with

Wherever you go

Though what lies inside of it

Nobody needs to know.

Don’t pull out your diary

For others to read

They’ll skip too many pages

To ever truly see,

That every line written

Every word scratched out

Every horror you have suffered

Instilled in you the doubt

That anyone could look inside

And see more than your name

When you brush away the glitter

You see the damage still remains.

Keep it tethered to you

Safeguard it at all cost

It’s not meant for show & tell

You can’t recover what’s been lost.